Mayo Clinic

Here’s Max, upon hearing my explanation of what goes into a chicken salad sandwich:

“I didn’t know mayonnaise was for eating. I thought it was for putting in your hair for lice.”

I don’t know which is the sadder commentary—that he’s never seen me make chicken or tuna salad because, more than not, I buy it pre-made at the supermarket, or that we’ve had too much experience with lice in the past two years.